When the bough breaks

I HAVE to fix the bed this weekend. It's a platform bed and it's support system is designed like a rope bed, but with wood slats. There is probably a name for that but I am way to tired to google that right now. One side is all saggy and I do get tired of climbing out of the other body hole all night. It doesn't make for a good nights sleep. I dream I'm being packaged into marshmallow bags and wake up feeling like I've been swimming in gooey fluffy coco all night.
This is the second bed we've broken. The first was a metal frame and suffered fatigue. Since neither of us learned how to weld we decided to get a wooden frame. As expected my wood working skills will be quite useful.
To R's credit he is willing to take responsibility for the bed breaking. Very thoughtful. I mean who wants to have to admit that they have gone through two beds....huh?
I think there was some assistance from a cat. Not just any cat, but the scariest cat I've met. Not mean, not ugly, just mastermind creepy. This cat once flew across a room and latched itself onto the face of my Rottweiler/German Shepard who, although well trained, had mauled the 2 cats it lived with the previous year. I mean what was this cat thinking? Look, big dog, if I rule that I rule the world. Must have larger minions! I pulled the cat off the dog's face and the cat moved back hissing. The dog was all like "what, what, what?" and I was worried it would go after the cat when the cat flew through the air again attacking like a monkey trained to ride a dog. Fortunately the dog is well trained, especially when I'm right there, and it was over quickly with another tossing of the cat and thus foiling the attempt to dominate the large dog and slowing the takeover of the world.
You get the picture. Creepy cat. This cat also refuses to sharpen it's claws on the usual cat type things. Cardboard, carpet, upholstery are not what this cat wants. The edge of a glass table, Now why didn't I think of that? I mean those other substances are really more likely to dull the claws. But glass, brilliant! I removed the glass table when we moved so we would suffer less surgical strikes from "playing". I know what you are thinking, poor kitten. It's okay though. She seems to be quite happy to sink her claws into all things wooden. My antique well loved, well oiled furniture has never been so adored by an animal. Well this brings us back to the bed (thank god). I'm sure you can guess. Yes, the cat lives under the bed (good place for an evil mastermind head quarters) and yes she has been working on this for months. Weakening the braces, plotting out downfall.
Thank goodness the dog did not move in with us, I'm sure she'd have trained it as phase 2.