I'm a laughing on the inside kinda clown

Reasons to HATE the Disney resorts
(These are just today’s)

You cannot book rooms directly with the Hotel, Ahem, EXCUSE me, resort (you will be corrected).
No one can tell you how far it is from point A to point B "I could guess, but I'm not very spatial (yes spatial not special).
No one can recommend a car service. (You let Goofey drive a car perhaps that's for the best)
You cannot speak to a “concierge” unless your guests reservation involves staying on the “concierge level” and remember the front desk seems not to exist.
You have to call the Disney Dining Hotline to make dinner reservations.
You cannot make dinner reservations more than 60 days out.
You THEN are told you cannot pick the time but will be assigned one, whatever is available (and HOW did it all get booked if I am calling 60 days out?!).
You are further informed that you MUST call the specific restaurant with a party over 10.
The restaurant will tell you they do not make the reservations themselves.
You will be transferred, put on hold and tortured repeatedly with chirpy, inane, nerve grinding, songs until you know the “Circle of Life” is not only happening everyday but it is killing you moment by moment and are sure that “part of that world” is supposed to be a hypnotizing, soul crushing, brain mushing mantra.
You will discover “party booking” must have a set menu and they prefer to talk about groups over 20.
You will be told that although you only want to shorten a stay there is no availability… even though the old reservation encompasses the new days
You will be cut off and transferred if you insist those days are available because you already have them reserved.



You will offer to kill the next person who, after abusing you in all these and many more ways, tells you to “Have a Magical day”

All before lunchtime