Some day I will look back on all this and laugh

So here it is. Mostly written down so that someday I can look back and laugh at what ridiculousness was so stressful and seemed so important.
My continual anxiety, our insane self-delusions, our defeatist realizations, our stupid pliability (bend so as-a not to break grasshopper).
Everyone “Wants”, and everyone gets what they want… except for me.
She wants to be a brides maid, she wants to sign the certificate, she wants it in Bean town, she wants it done cheaply, she wants my dress to look like this, She want's a DJ, she wants to be the jazz singer. Why is it no one offers?
The phrase “I want” is a demand and I am so tired of demands.
Hahaha remember that time R and I argued over stupid stuff.
Remember when we were going to do just the one event? Or how about the time she invited an extra 40 guests. HAhahahahHA Oh, god, when I got so strung out over the rumors people were spreading that I was some sort of Bridezilla?
*Sigh, wipe away the tears of mirth*
Goodness, I can’t believe we cared or ever thought this was our day. It was so much better when we just let everyone have their own way. Watching them fight amongst themselves was sooo much more entertaining.
How there was a debate and we ended up with a Yogi, a minister AND a Judge? Remember she was so nervous my hair ended up looking like Patsy from Absolutely Fabulous and I had to use a veil with fishing weights to weight it down? Remember she wanted us to spend less? There was a kitchen malfunction and the frozen Hors D'oeuvres weren’t cooked thoroughly so everyone just kept drinking and he got so drunk he puked all over my dress and I fell in the mud, oh let’s not forget the rain! Remember how she insisted I HAD to have flowers and since I was a disaster she pulled flowers (roots and all) from the neighbors garden for me?
Sotp, my side is hurting
And the club was booked so we ended up having the reception at the riptide bar and the old gals kept making lewd jokes about him knocking me up while soft-core porn played on the TV, and the juke-box only had 5 songs and they were all country and 3 people knew ALL the words, and I got drunk, broke into the old apartment (turned office) and fell asleep on the reception desk thus spending the beginning of our honeymoon waiting to make bail (I was the prettiest puke and mud stained bride in the tank), but his credit card was maxed out and everyone else had left town.

Yep, all better now. Hindsight will be 20-20. See, the things I worried about… nothing compared to the possible and unknowns.