Tonight, be on the look out for cats and candy

Cat Superstitions

Dreaming of white cat means good luck. - American superstition

To see a white cat on the road is lucky. - American superstition

It is bad luck to see a white cat at night. - American superstition

If a cat washes behind its ears, it will rain. - English superstition

A strange black cat on your porch brings prosperity. - Scottish superstition

A cat sneezing is a good omen for everyone who hears it. - Italian superstition

A cat sleeping with all four paws tucked under means cold weather ahead. - English superstition

When you see a one-eyed cat, spit on your thumb, stamp it in the palm of your hand, and make a wish. The wish will come true. - American superstition

In the Netherlands, cats were not allowed in rooms where private family discussions were going on. The Dutch believed that cats would definitely spread gossips around the town. - Netherlands superstition


As for the candy...
If you find this let me know!!!!

Sorry, no party AND a boring post

I feel exhausted.
This weekend I managed to scour the bathroom. I Sprayed and I scrubbed. I threw the dusty plastic bins in the dishwasher and bleached the grout between the tile on the floor. That is one clean and almost sterile room.
I also managed to realize the piles in the bedroom, of clean laundry and clothes needing to be hung up, were insurmountable. I cleaned out the mud-room because I knew the more I cleaned the more storage space I would be needing.
Course I may have to make it the smoking room for the party, just incase someone does bring their kids.
R and I gave up on having a Halloween party this year. It came up too fast on the heels of 2 solid months of social engagements and a world series. We decided to have a pre-season party. Invite everyone to get into shape for the marathon that is the Thanksgiving-Christmas-New Years. So the place has to be cleaned. R did offer to get a cleaning service in. But there is the old problem of having to be able to find the floor to clean it. Hopefully I can get it done next weekend. A friend will be in town with her friends the weekend of the 11th and then it’s our party, then Thanksgiving-Christmas-New Years.
R:"What do I say if people want to bring their kids?"
Me: "Gee, have we come to this?"
R: "I think so"
Me: "It would be rude to say no if the actually ask. But those would be your breeder friends anyway"
R:"mmrrph"
Me: "I suppose it would be too much hire a coat check and a kid check for the front door"

We did go out bike riding on Saturday and Sunday. It was a lovely weekend and we couldn’t justify staying in. Saturday we needed hair cuts and lunch. R has not had good luck with the el-cheep-o-cut’s and I had noticed this little salon and had seen the “stylists” out in front often enough that I was able to stereotype them as gay. I had already come to the conclusion that was what was wrong with the other barbers. Since R’s hair is a little long, the females who have cut his hair left him looking a bit girlish. Obviously what was needed was someone use to cutting men’s hair. It turned out much better. I went ahead and got mine cut too. I said 4 or 5 inches and when the guy was done he didn’t want me to look at the floor. It’s a good length. Shorter but still wrap-able (bun-able) and not so long I’ll find it tucked into my waistband anymore. Of course that was just his first test. I better give hairdressers tests before I walk in somewhere and tell them I’d like to try my hair short.

Bizarre Halloween Trivia

* Jack o’ lanterns originated in Ireland where people placed candles in hollowed-out turnips to keep away spirits and ghosts on the Samhain holiday.

* Halloween was brought to North America by immigrants from Europe who would celebrate the harvest around a bonfire, share ghost stories, sing, dance and tell fortunes.

* The ancient Celts thought that spirits and ghosts roamed the countryside on Halloween night. They began wearing masks and costumes to avoid being recognized as human.

* Halloween candy sales average about 2 billion dollars annually in the United States.

* Tootsie Rolls were the first wrapped penny candy in America. [what does that have to do with Halloween?]

* There really are so-called vampire bats, but they're not from Transylvania. They live in Central and South America and feed on the blood of cattle, horses and birds.

* If you see a spider on Halloween, it is the spirit of a loved on watching over you.

* Bobbing for apples is thought to have originated from the roman harvest festival that honors Pamona, the goddess of fruit trees.

* Black cats were once believed to be witch's familiars who protected their powers.

Polack Joke

A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl.
Although his English was far from perfect, they got along very well until one day he rushed into a lawyer's office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him -- "very quick."
The lawyer said that the speed for getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions:
LAWYER: "Have you any grounds?"
POLE: "JA, JA, acre and half and nice little home."
LAWYER: "No," I mean what is the foundation of this case?"
POLE: "It made of concrete."
LAWYER: "Does either! of you have a real grudge?"
POLE: "No, we have carport, and not need one."
LAWYER: "I mean, what are your relations like?"
POLE: "All my relations still in Poland."
LAWYER: "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?"
POLE: "Ja, we have hi- fidelity stereo set and good DVD player."
LAWYER: "Does your wife beat you up?"
POLE: "No, I always up before her."
LAWYER: "Is your wife a nagger?"
POLE: "No, she white."
LAWYER: "WHY do you want this divorce?"
POLE: "She going to kill me."
LAWYER: "What makes you think that?"
POLE: "I got proof."
LAWYER: "What kind of proof?"
POLE: "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom. I can read, and it say, 'Polish Remover'

I get it. It reminds me of the day my dad gave me a coin sealed in plastic and mounted for viewing in a cardboard case. "Polish," it said in big letters on white cardboard. I thought I was supposed to clean it, but couldn’t figure out how to get it out and back into the package. Sometime later, (as I took a closer look at the coin) I realized that "Polish," in this case, meant "Polack." So, know if you see a Polack post from me, it's to avoid the confusion experience - - - and it's a nod to the Polack side of the family who, most often, referred to themselves that way. They do not consider it a slur. Most reader knows that Shakespeare was the first to use the term.

Solemnization of Matrimony II

Or What I told my parole officer when he asked why I was in Wisconsin

Is not marriage an open question, when it is alleged, from the beginning of the world, that such as are in the institution wish to get out, and such as are out wish to get in?
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Another Wedding
A second Marriage
The white dress a little less fluffy.
The venue a little more adult.

The reception was (as all receptions are) a good time even if it was in Wisconsin. The scenery was spectacular. The rolling hills and changing colors lead us on to a tiny little town. I love tiny little towns, with their music playing over speakers in the downtown. It just so...yester-year. Unfortunately, I come across as mocking even when I'm not. Really, Eau Claire, I dig you. I'm not mocking you...Well maybe a little later.
In our defense: R considers anything too far north off of I-80 to be the “Great White North” and I am just completely insensitive. But I'm one of you. Look I have pictures of cows.
COWS!!!!

R and I were new to this whole aggressive advertising Wisconsin has for CHEESE. It is worse than all those signs you see, especially in the south, for FIREWORKS! R and I had almost convinced ourselves that we needed to find a currency exchange when we pulled off the highway to go a gas station, which you are supposed to identify by the large cheese sign I guess, and there it was a sign that said Master Card, Visa, American Express, no personal cheques, CHEESE.
But then there is always the question of how much you think you’ll spend because what are you gonna do with a foreign currency when you get back home. I mean a little is cool. A reminder of when you were in Europe, the Netherlands or the British West Indies. But Cheese is not gonna wear so well. They also had the "Incase of emergency" numbers posted facing the outside on a window.
Fire 911
Ambulance 911
Police 911
Wheew, thank the lord they posted those. I might forget.
Did I mention it was rustic?

So on to the reception.
The first time she was married it was in Disney World to her college sweetheart. He was cute and funny. But in the end their paths wandered their own directions. Waking up one day and realizing that you should be somewhere else is a peculiar feeling. And all it takes to move sometimes is a little nudge from someone else. Someone who stirs that ol' lust nugget within.
Her second wedding was held in Vegas. This time the groom was a military sweetheart. The reception was held upstairs in a jazz bar. It was the nicest spread of red velvet couches, an attentive bartender and food (the center piece was, of course, cheese).


The reception dwindled down and we walked throught the Erie and deserted streets of small town USA to the next bar. It was Children of the Corn quiet… the neon glow giving the damp sidewalks that Night of the Living Dead appeal.
We went on drinking and dancing the night away. That's what nights and receptions are for. I have to admit that I havn't been in a meat market in years, and this one packed 'em in. Strangers dancing up-on you. Random groping. I had some nasty guy "all up on me" and told him to "Bounce". Yes I said Bounce. Damn young wippersnapper all up in my grill...and I couldn't help it. It just happened. No matter where you are visiting from Eau Clair WI will make you feel like a big fish in a small pond. Still that I had told someone to bounce was a bit much for me to take seriously. The rest of the night I was careful to phrase my request differently all night: "beat it", "pound sand", "back the fuck off!".
All in all it was a good time. Then when we left the bar we reenacted one of the oldest high school movie gags and crammed 9 people in a civic, (or something), and went back to the hotel.

Ahh, good times.
Thanks Wisconsin

Finally, in the 14th inning, after 5 hours and 41 minutes

I can say the Sox rock!

They were behind, the made a comeback (with five runs in the fifth inning) and then the Astros tied it up in the eighth...and stayed tied, tied, tied....
Houston got only one hit after the fourth inning and I think it was the next inning the Sox pitcher smashed a batter in the head with one of his 90+ mph balls. The Sox and the Astros fought for who could create the most tension with a combined 30 runners stranded on bases (another record). They were always on base, they were always stealing bases they were on all the bases... they were never brought home, but were always threatening.

It was the longest series game in history.
It was a great game. Very full of tension but by 1:30 in the morning I was so ready for it to be over, I wanted to go home.

It will be another late night tonight.

Solemnization of Matrimony

To have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part. From the Book of Common Prayer
So there are weddings and there are receptions. And for me, that's as far as that particular cycle of life goes.
Someone falls in love and decides to announce their attempt at happily ever after in front of God and everybody. That's just setting yourself up (publicly) for failure if you ask me.
But Lord love the fools, they sure do throw a good party afterwards.

It was in China town and as I stepped out on the balcony for a cigarette I noticed the bright full moon lit up the peeks of the pagoda type roofs and cast shadows on the empty marketplace below. The only thing out of place this night was my cinematic cultural conditioning that kept me on the look out for roof top leaping ninjas and market street terrorizing motorcycle gangs. But even without those things The Chinese wedding reception had to be in the top 5.
First of all there is this custom that I think every culture should take up. The bride gets MORE jewelry from the parents after the wedding. Sure maybe it’s what’s left of the tradition of buying a bride or dowry or something, but damn…what girl wouldn’t like a little extra bling?
The second custom I would like to incorporate is their version of the toast and making the rounds to greet all the guests. The bride and groom have to go from table to table and do shots with each table. Not only does this mean each table has their own bottle of liquor (in this case Cognac), but you also get to get the 2 best dressed people falling down drunk. But they did sober up a bit through the 12-course dinner. As for serving a 12-course dinner, well that’s just good manners.
Every thing is done for good luck. All the dishes with heads, had their heads included in the dish. You know, just for luck (or shock value). The place settings each had a smiling Buda for (a party favor and) good luck. However people can bring bad luck. For example, it is bad luck not to eat something from every course (again with the “just good manners”) and sure enough someone refused to eat from the very first dish. Well I guess it was her own bad luck then…

She and her husband had to take the head plate home.

Mr. and Mrs. Hastings

Another trip begun
Unseen change finds you
Immersed and engaged.
Surmounted things rush by you.
No longer is it “I am running:
Everything else is standing still”.
You feel the movement of things around you
Barely counting their passing
They come and go.
Let the whirlwinds take them
While you move
Patiently, deliberately,
Together having begun
The journey to eternity.

the wealth hazard

Most people begin their relationship with plastic on terms of convenience. They have enough money in the bank to pay for the groceries or gas, but it is just so much more convenient to swipe a card than to go through the hassle of getting the cash. And the monthly statement offers such a tidy record of transactions. It is so convenient.

Then comes the time when the bank balance is a bit low and the perfect shoes are on sale. Using the credit card becomes not only a convenience, but quite a remarkable instrument of entitlement. Can't pay the entire balance when the statement comes? Not to worry! Thanks to that minimum payment option, you can pay a small amount and buy yourself another 30 days. Such convenience.

Convenience quickly leads to mindless spending. There's no conscious thought of the real cost. The plastic wealth hazards allow one to dismiss a $200 outfit as just a $10-a-month payment starting next month. But right now you can take it home for nothing.

Can you remember the last time you bought gasoline? If you used your ATM or credit card you probably don't have a clue how much you paid per gallon. Was it the best price in town? Do you know which station has the lowest price? Probably not. As long as you have the security of plastic at your disposal, nothing else seems to matter.

Try to recall the last time you actually saved for something instead of buying it first and then making the payments. Americans are not known for their saving prowess -- and no wonder. We're mesmerized by the convenience of conspicuous accumulation.

this tirade brought to you by my first credit card and its very own statement.

pizza bomber death

So much has been going on while I’ve been away. It takes some time to catch up on my stories. My stories. Yeah, I guess they are like my version of soap operas. Peoples lives unraveling before me, bits of fiction growing and fleshing out like a woman; prime for child bearing, clever reincarnations of what blandly passes for news, and the occasional lunacy twisting into a knowing smirk.
I have missed you all my darlings.

Since I’m so busy catching up on my stories, and maintaining employment, I’m thinking vignettes for now.

Heres an update on a story that strangely slipped my attention.

The afternoon unfolded like a horrible episode of “The Twilight Zone”: 46-year-old Wells delivered a pie on the afternoon of August 28, 2003. He was next seen strapped into a collar bomb, robbing a bank with a gun fashioned out of a cane and nine pages of instructions leading him on a deadly scavenger hunt.
Police apprehended him after the robbery. Then, while local news cameras rolled, the bomb exploded, killing Wells....some reports suggest they are investigating Floyd Stockton Jr., a convicted rapist currently serving time in Washington state. Stockton once lived on the same road where Wells delivered the pizza.
In another twist, shortly after Wells was killed, a body was found in the freezer of the home Stockton shared with roommate William Rothstein. The body belonged to the ex-boyfriend of Rothstein‘s friend, Marjorie Diehl-Armstrong. Armstrong pleaded guilty to that murder and is currently serving time. Rothstein died of cancer last year.

Man, I wish this was one of my stories. I would LOVE to get into the characters heads and hear the end.

death, diease, lottery, crack

My computer died. No, I didn't drop or kick or drop-kick it.
It died of loneliness. I left it on and it was tired of being ignored, I guess, because when I came back it was dead.
It was in a batch that had been recalled for some disease or other so I got a new power…coil no, no that’s an engine…relay (I think). I guess it was like the lottery in that some of us’ns got crappy computers. But they did fix it for free. So I’m back and supposedly “nothing” is missing from my files. I’ll just have to believe them as I have too many files to check. I wonder what embarrassing thing they found to joke about. You know during a job there always has to be some crack at another’s expense. Turn it into a running joke and before you know the job is done. It’s usually at the clients expense whether it is the server to the kitchen about your order, or the sales clerk about you grunting in the dressing room, or the consultant while writing out the invoice. I just wonder what I was for them. Now I DO have to look through all my files.


All but the vacation, eh Johnny?

And she ran and ran and ran

And she tasted like salt at the end

I call her crazy, but then I always have.
26 miles IS crazy. Or maybe it's just that I could never do it.
Her pre-marathon training included drinking half of Napa Valley, smoking and hanging out with her friends till all hours 2 nights before. Now that, I can (and did), get down with. The heavy Italian food the night before...down with that too. But the running...
I'm really more of a reader and my preferred form of self-abuse seems to be bourbon.

She brought back stories from the run. People cheering on as people dropped trow on the side of the road to urinate, a guy offering little bottles of beer to the runners, people sweating , bleeding, puking. I just never realized there were so many bodily fluids involved in a marathon. She told me how the crowd would pick out something about a runner to cheer them on “go bald-guy, keep it up pink-shorts, way to go shit-your-pants” (and since she was wearing a t-shirt that held the name of her acting troupe which ended in Satan) the crowd cheering Satan on to the finish line. “Com’on Satan, you can do it!”
It was a good time. And the post marathon party was (in my opinion) well worth all her effort and pain. It was a great party, even if all anyone talked about was her and the marathon. She’s so cool, she so strong, she so great, she’s on TV. No one even cared that I was kinda sore from weightlifting the day before, that I had been active too, that I had had to deal with a crowd too. I had to walk thru the park for an hour looking for her…a WHOLE hour!

Yeah sure she got a cool medal, a Mylar blanket and all kinds of respect (even from me), and she is probably healthier for it, but I can do something she can't...I can walk today.

And in other news...

Morman's may be trying to reach out to their sons.
Two Utah families say instead of a family film about a religious boy band, the DVD's they bought at bookstores owned by the Mormon church contained the unrated movie, "Adored: Diary of a Porn Star." Producers of "Adored" say their film has sexual situations but it's not X rated. The film is about a gay porn star that reconnects with his family.

Meanwhile the pagan families are sacrificing their children to Satan.
or
When fires break out. Firemen like to reenact them.
Robert Howe, chief fire prevention officer with the state Department of Public Safety, on Tuesday urged anyone with the decorations a candlelit bucket with a jack-o-lantern face to return them to the store where the item was purchased for a refund.
"It's designed to be used with one candle, but it comes with eight little candles and the consumer lit all eight at the same time," Howe said. He said there were no instructions with the item to indicate that just one candle was to be lit at a time.
Chief Troy Ruggles said his firefighters took the second bucket the Dudleys had bought at Price Chopper and took it back to the fire station. They lit all eight candles in the Halloween decoration, and within 10 minutes it was a raging fire, Ruggles said.

Speaking of parents and Halloween and pick pocket children...
Boy Thought Drugs Were Candy.
The 25yr old was walking to a store with his girlfriend's 4 yr. old son when the boy took what he believed to be candy from Medina's pants pocket and consumed it. Officers found an additional $14,000 worth of drugs in a bathroom drawer that authorities said was easily accessible to the children who lived in the house.

And question of the day.

Is this front or back?